Frameworks I keep coming back to. They aren’t rules. Use them as prompts for conversation, with yourself and with the people you share space with.
Do you want to be charmed with yourself?
How these three concepts differ, and why embodied consent is a healthier baseline than the popular enthusiastic-consent model.
Read →Consent has two halves: what's true inside you and what's true between you. Three questions, a map of the territory, and every tool's harm mode.
Read →Different yeses authorize different things. Seven shapes of yes, each informed or uninformed, four kinds of maybe, the five messages inside a no, and the unspoken forms of all three.
Read →Why I call them Attunement Conversations, and what shifts when everyone in the room is tuning to each other instead of bargaining.
Read →Relationships, Boundaries, Desires, Safety, Meaning & Maintenance. A five-letter checklist for showing up well.
Read →When things happen, not if. Risk mitigation, risk profiles, and Emergency Action Plans for showing up prepared instead of surprised.
Read →Three muscles you build together: knowing you have a choice, knowing what your choice actually is, and checking the answer with your body.
Read →You will hurt people. Accountability is what you do. Repair is what the person you hurt actually needs. They aren't the same thing.
Read →Most communities only know two tools for harm: pretend it didn't happen, or shame and exile. There is a third, and it's harder.
Read →Every tool in this library can be used as a weapon. Here's what that looks like, on the receiving end and from the inside.
Read →A fillable worksheet for relationship check-ins. Eight steps plus quick, new-relationship, and long-term variants. Download as text or save as PDF.
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